Finding and losing

I found myself reading your letter today,

I smiled and i cried at the same time

Will i still fight for you or not?

Will i still cherish the memories we had?

I found myself trying to contact your cp numbers

And i think if i will call you, will it be matters?

Will you answer my call and say hi?

Or if you recognize my voice will u say hi and bye?

I found myself looking at your picture with her

And im too confused that i don’t know what to feel

If this is still the feeling of love?

Or is this the feeling of losing my love?

I found myself saying a prayer for you.

That no matter what, you will end up happy

And if we will meet each other again

I hope that day will never end.

I’m losing my self

Will you find me or not?

Im losing you in my life

Will you come back?

Im losing the feeling

Will it still go back?

Im losing you..

Is this what you want me to do....????

The Dreamer

I don’t know what to start

Is this love or is this illusion?

But i call it as a best dream

Its like a real magical feeling.

I’m not obsessed I might say,

But you make my day so gay.

Staring to your picture most often,

And oh I really love to hear your name.

When i think about something like destiny

Why the picture in my mind is you and me??

Trying to hide my feelings makes me sick

Especially when you’re beside me, gets me weak.

Wishes are free as they said so ill keep wishing,

That one day you’re holding my heart instead of hers.

That one day you will feel the same way.

As i dream of you loving me.

maudlin moments

Dont know what to do...

if i will still hold on to this feeling?

if i will still love you?

if i will continue to build dreams with you..?

Dont know what to think...

if i will still think youre always okay?

if i will still care for everything about you?

if i will still dream of you every single day...?

Dont know what to say...

if i will still say your name without any tears?

if i will still call you mine?

if i will still say you deserve me even if youre with somebody's arms...?

Did you ever love me?

Did you ever care for me?

I guess not. I dont know.

yeah, i really dont know ...

its night time again

Its night time again......
my best part of the day
where i could go back to my dreams
where there is you.

its night time again...
youre there beside me
saying your prayer
asking the man above to bless me..

its night time again..
where we smile to the stars and the moon.
we promise that we will be together.
but our dreams and fantasy slowly ends.




its night time again ..
the time where i can't no longer hear your heartbeat
youre gone yet, im still dreaming what i used to.
youre here hugging me, i dont wanna wake up..

ill be dreaming again tonight...

love talks

Let me think of you today,
tomorrow and forever...

Let me love u now
and till the end of time..

Let me be the only one
beside you always..

Let me share to you my life,
my soul and my everything...

Just let me...
please!

you're my angel..
my sweet sunshine..

my love,
my life,

my happiness...
i will just stop loving you, if forever is through...





The sweet reply: i will love you even after forever, my heaven

Remember

LOVE SICK

ROOM 143

Give me a placebo to my broken heart,
hoping you are here hugging me tight.
youre the cure to my every cells,
No need to have any medications nor even potent pills.
Kiss me so i can breathe,
dont need to inhale an artificial air.
my vital signs were unstable everytime i see you,
weird feelings but i wanted to be with you.
Staring on flat affect now that we were apart,
my neurons can't tell why you just turn your back.
im struggling between life and death,
when you starting to say your final words.
my congested heart wants to die,
as you speak your bloody goodbye.

I'm sick to be a patient of love.

Lovezyah 101

Its all about love. What makes love a real love..and something about true love... Read and reflect.
After reading this, share your thoughts and leave a message. For you, what's your definition of love?



*** The Real Thing - Love Should Feel Good ***


Often in our lives, we fall prey to the idea of a thing rather than actually experiencing the thing itself. We see this at play in our love lives and in the love lives of our friends, our family, and even fictional characters. The conceptualizing, depiction, and pursuit of true love are multimillion-dollar industries in the modern world. However, very little of what is offered actually leads us to an authentic experience of love. Moreover, as we grasp for what we think we want and fail to find it, we may suffer and bring suffering to others. When this is the case, when we suffer more than we feel healed, we can be fairly certain that what we have found is not love but something else.

When we feel anxious, excited, nervous, and thrilled, we are probably experiencing romance, not love. Romance can be a lot of fun as long as we do not try to make too much of it. If we try to make more of it than it is, the romance then becomes painful. Romance may lead to love, but it may also fade without blossoming into anything more than a flirtation. If we cling to it and try to make it more, we might find ourselves pining for a fantasy, or worse, stuck in a relationship that was never meant to last.

Real love is identifiable by the way it makes us feel. Love should feel good. There is a peaceful quality to an authentic experience of love that penetrates to our core, touching a part of ourselves that has always been there. True love activates this inner being, filling us with warmth and light. An authentic experience of love does not ask us to look a certain way, drive a certain car, or have a certain job. It takes us as we are, no changes required. When people truly love us, their love for us awakens our love for ourselves. They remind us that what we seek outside of ourselves is a mirror image of the lover within. In this way, true love never makes us feel needy or lacking or anxious. Instead, true love empowers us with its implicit message that we are, always have been, and always will be, made of love.
_An article from DailyOM_

Dedicated for him

Oh, God, Forgive Me When I Whine

~~~~~~~
Today, upon a bus, I saw a girl with golden hair
I looked at her and sighed and wished I was as fair.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and used a crutch
But as she passed, she passed a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.

~~~
I stopped to buy some candy
The lad who sold it had such charm
I talked with him a while, he seemed so very glad
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.

~~~
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue
He stood and watched the others play
He did not know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others, dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew, he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.

~~~
With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I would know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I've been blessed indeed, The world is mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This morning when I awakened and saw the sun above,
I softly said, "Good morning Lord, bless everyone I love."
And right away I thought of you and said a loving prayer,
that He would bless you specially, and keep you free from care.
I thought of all the happiness a day could hold in store.
I wished it all for you because no one deserves it more.

~~~~~~
Sorrow looks back,
Worry looks around,
Faith looks up.

~~~~~~
I asked Jesus, "How much do you love me?"
Jesus answered, "This much."
and He stretched
His arms out and died.

~~~~~~
this poem was shared to me by one of my residents in Bowview(nsg.home)
she read it to me one night before i put her in bed...